BBDW 75 [Black Butterfly] - Nevereverland

Section 88 (UNEDITED) 

The weather was damp. Even though it was not sunny, it’s not like it wasn’t at all. The city was submerged in the colour of milk-like sunlight mixed with water. Jude headed for the area where the incident took place a few days ago with a slight gait. A disorderly telephone pole and a silhouette of more disorderly intertwined wires. As he stepped on the blurry shadows that covered the jagged ground, he soon stopped walking in front of a house.

He could tell it was this place with uncanny clarity. It was a building where he spent hundreds of days, almost a thousand days. It was a little different from what it used to be. It used to be old, but now it's gotten worse and the framework was exposed here and there. How come it hasn't been demolished yet? It's been a long time. Is it that it's such a dark building that they didn't rush to touch it, or is someone living in a haunted house like this? Staring up at the building for a moment, Jude slowly approached the entrance. As he glanced at Jude a few times from the side of the road, a man with a not bad impression spat and called him. His cigarette smoke rose in a colour resembling the sunlight.

"Hey, why are you going in there?"

"Am I not supposed to go in?"

"No, what, you're homeless? It doesn't look like that. But it's a dump where homeless people and children occasionally lie down at night. If there's no business, I'd rather not go in."

Jude grinned. The man frowned suspiciously.

"That's kind of you, but I have something to look into. It'll only take a moment."

"Well, do whatever you want."

The man threw the cigarette he had in his hand on the ground and stamped it out. Jude, who quickly took his eyes off the man turning his back, looked down briefly at his hand holding the doorknob. He wished he could swallow his dry saliva, but his body is strangely still like the calm before the storm.

Kkiiig, the doorknob turned. The intrusive sound of the hinges of the old door scratched his eardrum. There's been a bad smell coming from inside. The air in the barren house was dry and crumbly, with no one settling in. He doesn’t know if the man’s word "garbage dump" was a figurative expression or not, but it also had a pretty strong odour. You'll smell it after a long time. Jude moved his feet, thinking calmly.

It was still dark inside the house even though it was morning. Yeah, it hasn't been a long time since it is sunny all day. Jude muttered in his mouth.  

After more than a decade, the house was so similar to the point where he felt bad. Although everywhere was rotten, crumbled, and filled with miscellaneous things, it was the same as back then, not to mention the old, creaky floor. Jude stuck out his feet slowly as if he was walking in a dream. It wasn't a dream of walking on a flowery path, but a nightmare that he can't escape.

-It's because you’ve been living with your head turned.

Alvin's words crossed his mind. The sound of stepping on the stairs leading upstairs as well as his voice mixed together and clouded his mind. There were two doors on the second floor as he climbed up to the last step. Passing through the first door, Jude spat out slowly in a voice unfamiliar to himself.

"...... not here.......... this was his room..."

Who's he? It was also funny to think about the answer to the question of the voice. But Jude couldn't laugh. The second door was slightly open. Jude, who turned away from the gap in the door and looked at the floor, soon reached out. Very slowly, like a drop of water hitting the ground from the ceiling of a cave, he pushed the door. The door opened louder and wider with a quiet cacophony.

The scene unfolding before his eyes was simple. The small room was littered with a few clutter, rubbish and bottles of liquor scattered all over the place.

A cockroach disappeared into a hole in the wall, scurrying with its long antennae. And a large fireplace, located directly in front of the door, is no longer recognizable by dust.

- It was this scene.

-Yeah, this was it. A whispering voice woke him up.

"...it was here."

His small voice rang strikingly clear in the still room. He couldn't be happier with the fact that it still remained. Jude walked into the room tantalizingly slowly across the six-sided spaces. When the fireplace was about three meters ahead, Jude halted with a start.

-In front of his eyes, three children who settled in front of the fireplace were talking. A child sitting with his back to him, a boy with a pretty good physique and strong eyes, and a girl with long brown hair and a gentle face. Jude, who looked at them vacantly, soon sat down. The past is giving him an admission ticket in a way that he did not know whether it was the devil's plan or the angel's plan. And Jude did not reject it.

 

[I don't want him to come today.]

The girl spoke morosely. The boy, who sat with his back to Jude, responded anxiously.

[Then what about our meal?]

[Is that even rice? Nobody feeds that to dogs either.]

The big boy retorted with a voice full of loathing. That said, the child with his back to him agreed and bowed his head.

[The old orphanage director is like a great witch. This guy's a piece of crap, despicable mash-up….]

[Don't be like that, Toby. Let's not get mad and just play, okay?]

Jenny. Jude whispered in his mouth. Toby, the big boy, replied bluntly, shoving her shoulder.

[Why do you always have to be so weak? You always whine when he comes and hits you, so useless. Bite him off or fight back with a pipe or something? I told you to do it.]

[W-well, that might be right...]

Jenny made a teary face. Toby turned his head and looked at the long iron skewer next to the fireplace. The skewers that were rusting here and there seems to be like the stuff used to stir up the fireplace, but it was getting old together next to the fireplace, which had never been set on fire in the first place. Toby shifted his gaze from the skewer and spoke.

[Hey, Hender, what do you think? Leaving this place...]

[Huh? What do you mean?]

[Let's get away from here like we ran away from the orphanage last time. Don't tell me there's no better place than here? We just didn't have to go to that orphanage. As long as the food is served on time.]

[But... what about him? He won't let us run away. He always locks the door except when we have to pickpocket while him watching outside.]

The child with his back to him scratched his head. Toby spat irritatingly on the floor. It bothers him that his eyes were so poisonous as they were flashing toward the skewers. Jude bit his lip.

-Rattle! The door opening from behind can be heard. Jude flinched and looked back. A man with bristly, broom-stiff hair was entering the room. The children, as they huddled together, moved to the fireplace little by little, showing signs of vigilance. The man with a small bottle of liquor in one hand threw the empty bottle at the children. The smell of unwashed body and alcohol mixed and irritate the nose. Jenny let out a small scream. As if something had gone wrong with his body, the man with unusually dark eyes approached the fireplace with a slightly wobbly step. A twisted loser's smile appeared on his face. The way he swayed his wrist resoundingly was unusual.

[Yesterday, I slept without hitting you bastard, and I felt like I was in a bad mood today. So let's get it right today, huh, shall we?]

[Crazy son of a b*tch, you f*cking stay there.]

A vulgar sound popped out of Toby's mouth. The man's hazy eyes flashed. He strode up and swung Jenny's hair instead of Toby. The girl screamed. Her small body was dragged helplessly. The man bent over and picked up the bottle that was rolling on the floor. Bang! The bottle was smashed with a not-so-small sound. Holding the half-jagged bottle of liquor, he waved it before Jenny's eyes. Jenny whimpers and swallowed her tears.

[You kids….. Spare the rod and you'll spoil them. This is also a kind of education.]

The cross-section of the protruding bottle touched the back of Jenny's neck. Jenny shuddered and hardened herself. The man slowly moved his hand. A long vein of blood leaked out from the girl's neck and ran through the bottle. Jenny couldn't even breathe properly.

[Don't...don't do that...don't...don't...]

Jenny barely managed to beg with a cry. The man soon threw the girl's body away roughly. Throwing the bottle back, he picked up a piece of iron pipe that was rolling randomly in a corner of the room.

And there followed an unbridled violence. Jude looked at the scene, flabbergasted. Neither the boy who sat with his back to him, the boy who uttered aggressive words, nor the girl with her neck scratched against the bottle could resist. Even if he was skinny and drunk, their opponent was an adult, and he was absolutely in control of their life and death. Furthermore, the experience of submission, which had been suffered for many days, froze the children's bodies.  

Yes, they didn't dare think to rebel. They were like clay, young and easy to deform.  

[Whoo......it feels cool now.]

He looked really relieved. Even wiping the sweat off his forehead – if it wasn't for the children rolling on the floor and the thing in his hand - it was believable to say that he had just been in a healthy labour field. With a fresher face, he threw out the weapon in his hand, searched his pockets and threw a bar of chocolate on the floor.

[You'll be out working tomorrow, so eat up. If tomorrow is as poor as it was before, be prepared.]

He turned away. Staggering heavily as if he had not only drunk but also drugged himself, he headed for the door without proper balance. Jude swallowed his dry saliva. Sweat permeated into his fist.

Among the children lying on the floor, Toby looked up. There was an incredible ferocity on his small face. The child's eyes turned and headed toward the fireplace. A rusty iron skewer that Toby couldn't take his eyes off completely until he came in. Jude bit his lip.

Toby did not hesitate for long. He had to finish the job before he closed the door and locked it. Jude understood the situation dryly. Toby, who picked up the rusty iron skewer, ran straight to him. The moment the man just grabbed the doorknob, the skewer stuck into the back of his neck.

Puuk, the sound of foreign substances invading between the muscles ring in his ears clearly. The man's mouth burst into screams like metal scratching on something. The man, whose eyes were opened wide enough to pop out, knelt on the spot. Jenny shouted behind Toby's back.  

[To-Toby! what are you doing? What’s up with you!]

[So noisy, shut up!]

Toby pulled out the skewer that had been stuck. Once again, the shrill sound fluctuated. The man looked back at Toby, holding on to the back of his neck with his hand, where blood was gushing out like a spring. The light mixed in his eyes was peculiar. Panic and astonishment, scepticism that appears when a herbivore that you thought would never be able to climb up suddenly took a predator's neck with its horns. Anger, desire for life, fear and dread. Toby stabbed his eye with the pulled iron skewer.

With a great deal of blood, Jenny and the man screamed at the same time.

[Argh! No, no! Stop it, Hender, Hender! Please stop him!]

Hender. Jude turned his head and saw the child sitting with his back showing to him at first. The face looking at Jenny was faltering, though young, that was clearly himself who he looked in the mirror every morning. Hender spoke carefully to Toby with a face mixed with fear and discomfort.

[To, Toby. Stop it. That's a bit...]

[Noisy, shut up.]

[Toby.]

Toby turned his eyes away. Hender keeps quiet as his eyes burned. Toby's voice resembled a cobra that raised its head and hissed.

[Because you can't do it. If it's not me, who's gonna do it? So stay back. Don't bother me. You don't really want to stop me, do you?]

Yes, that’s right. There was no way he really wanted to stop it. Because he was a tyrant who forced children to do something every day. Hender shut his mouth. Jenny looked alternately at Hender and Toby with incredulity.

[No, no way. You can't do this, you can't!]

Jenny ran to Toby. Toby burst into anger as her thin hand held Toby's arm. There was blood all over the clothes.

[What's wrong with you? Shut up, go away! Hey, Hender, do something about her.]

[Don't do that, there's another way! Don't do this, okay? Don't be like this!]

[Shut up, useless girl. What have you been helping with so far?]

[No, don't just watch! Stop him! Help me!]

[Shut up!]

It was in no time that the iron skewer in Toby's hand changed direction. The boy, full of hostility, malice and excitement, didn't hesitate to give it off to the girl. Hender, who had only been looking at Toby and Jenny's scuffle from afar, recoiled in surprise. The girl, with an iron skewer stuck in her neck, slowly fell to the floor with her back to Hender. The sound of shallow breathing was heard unnecessarily clear. Jude looked at her, placing his hand on his speeding heart. Toby pulled out the skewer with a dubious face. Jenny's body bounced up and puffed, and then she fell silent. Toby picked up the skewer and took another shot at the man as he caught a rough breath. The man's convulsions also stopped after a long time.

Toby, with blood all over his clothes and face, saw Hender frozen in front of the fireplace and soon threw away the skewer in his hand.

[......I didn't like her the whole time. She doesn't know how to do anything but whine….. I've had enough of that; we don't need such a pip with us. A weak girl like her will only drag our ankles later. Hey, come here and help me.]

[Uh-huh?]

[Help me! If we don't want to get caught up in this, we have to take care of these things.]

Hender approached him blankly. Together, the body was moved into the fireplace and the blood splattered like paint on the floor was wiped. Behind Toby, who crumpled the bodies of the dead inside the fireplace, Hender stared at the figure of the big boy.  

Jude saw Hender's hands trembling. In front of his eyes, two people, one of whom he has played with, died. And the other friend who killed her didn't seem to feel much about it. -I might die, too. Jude could equally surmise what came into the child's head. There was nothing significant on Hender's face. Even though the fear that the child feels are stronger than Toby's, it was basically very light. But the fear clearly existed, and, however minimal it may be, it was fear about survival.

As soon as Toby covered the two overlapping bodies inside the fireplace, Hender sneaked up the iron skewer that Toby had thrown on the floor. Jude unwittingly raised his hand and covered his mouth. No matter how strong the child is, he has no talent in attacking from an unexpected direction. Jude’s thought is strangely plain. Maybe Toby felt a strange sign, or maybe he was just trying to call Hender, but as soon as he turned his head back, Hender vigorously stabbed him with what he had in his hand.

-Puuk! A sound that was clearer than the sound he had just heard hit his ears. It was as if the sensation was transmitted through his fingertips. Jude twitched briefly on the spot. The boy with a skewer stuck in the middle of his chest breathes hard and fell down, hitting his head on the fireplace with a thump. The eyes of the child, who sheds blood from his mouth, trembled with resentment and anger.

[You........]

Hender's hand, which held onto the skewer, was shaking a little harder than it had just been. Although not much. With his hand shaking in the same manner as Hender, Jude looked Toby in the eye. A croaky voice came out with difficulty.

[You…. how could you….. do this to me?]

It can’t be like this. I couldn't have done this. I didn't even want to do this. Jude dryly laid out excuses that contained as much sincerity as a pinch of salt inside. Hender fixed the skewer and stabbed him once more. Toby's body shook once and soon quieted down. Hender's face, as he dropped the skewer on the floor, was unknowingly filled with a deep emptiness. Meanwhile, the light of determination to stay alive in his eyes sent shivers down Jude's spine. Hender, who had been breathing for a long time in a standing position, soon ran out of the room. What soon returned with the child in his hand was an old lighter. He must have gone and brought it from the next room where the man slept. Over the bodies piled up inside the fireplace, Hender set the lighter on them. With a click, a small spark splashed, and the bodies were caught on fire. The fireplace, which had been left unattended in dust and ashes for a long time, made a strange thud. Did the dust accumulated on top fall into the sudden flame?

The fireplace was blazing for the first time in a very long time and exuded tremendous heat. Because it was a cold day, he reflexively thought it was warm at first. Then the foul smell of burning protein irritated his nose, and Hender coughed a few times in the black smoke and stepped back. There was a confused light in his green eyes. The fierce loss came before him like a thunderbolt and seemed to have left the child speechless. Jude squeezed his chest lightly.  

The child, who was looking down at his blood-soaked clothes, soon staggered. He had to go outside. He had to get away from here sooner or later. And he had to hide in a safe place. He didn't even get a change of clothes, and he didn't have time to pack it. Hender turned around. The moment Jude faced his young face head-on, Jude swallowed his breath. The messy blond child, distracted, gasped and soon ran outside. Jude stared blankly at the blazing pile of flames, unable to look back.

And at one point the flame disappeared before his eyes.

Jude hasn't moved in a while. It was almost two minutes later that the blond detective, who was looking at the fireplace forgetting to breathe, began to cough up intense breathing.

-He said Toby killed Jenny. After that, he didn't want to talk.

No wonder he didn't want to talk. No wonder he wanted to forget. He couldn't have wanted to say he stabbed a friend who had been protecting him with his own hand.

-Toby killed Jenny.

"So I..."

I killed Toby. Jude murmured dryly as if he was just notifying others of the fact. Jude hugged his knees lightly in a sitting position. He didn't feel like crying or screaming, but strangely he wanted to curl up. He felt like disintegrating quietly in the sand of the desert. Without lying on the floor, in the room of the two-story building filled with clutter and piles of rubbish, Jude buried his face between his knees in the sparse sunlight.  

*        *        *

I-
*hugs a chibi Jude tightly while crying a river of tears.
See ya.